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Unarmored: The new way to lead.

2 days ago
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“Unarmored” leadership is a way of leading that replaces defensiveness, image-management, and rigid authority with clarity, humility, emotional honesty, and accountability. It does not mean being unfiltered, fragile, or permissive. It means showing up without “armor”—the protective behaviors leaders often use to avoid discomfort (e.g., blame, certainty, control, perfectionism, or emotional distance)—and instead building trust through transparency, curiosity, and consistent follow-through.

This approach reflects a shift in what modern teams need: psychological safety, adaptability, and meaning—not just direction. In fast-changing environments, leaders who can acknowledge uncertainty, invite dissent, and learn in public often outperform leaders who rely on command-and-control habits.

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What “armor” looks like in leadership (and why it fails)

Leadership “armor” is typically a set of reflexes that protect the leader’s ego or status, especially under pressure. Common forms include:

  • Certainty armor: acting like you have all the answers to avoid appearing weak.
  • Control armor: micromanaging to reduce anxiety and prevent mistakes.
  • Perfection armor: punishing failure (in yourself or others) to maintain an image of excellence.
  • Distance armor: staying emotionally detached so you don’t have to engage in hard conversations.
  • Blame armor: deflecting responsibility to preserve authority.

These behaviors can produce short-term compliance, but they often erode long-term performance. They reduce candor, suppress early warnings, and teach people to manage impressions rather than solve problems.

Why it fails: When people fear embarrassment or retaliation, they hide mistakes, avoid risk, and stop speaking up—conditions that undermine learning and innovation.

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The core principles of unarmored leadership

1) Courageous transparency (without oversharing)

Unarmored leaders share what’s true and relevant: what they know, what they don’t, what they’re deciding, and what tradeoffs exist. They don’t dump emotions onto the team; they provide clarity and context.

Example: Instead of saying, “Don’t worry, we’re fine,” you say:

  • “Revenue is down 8% this quarter. We’re not doing layoffs right now, but we are freezing hiring and prioritizing retention. Here’s what we’re doing this month, and here’s what I need from you.”

Impact: People spend less energy guessing and more energy executing.

2) Accountability without blame

Unarmored leadership treats accountability as ownership and learning, not punishment. The leader models it first.

Example language:

  • “I made the call to ship early and underestimated QA needs. That’s on me. Here’s how we’ll adjust the process so it doesn’t repeat.”

Impact: Teams become more willing to surface issues early—when they’re still fixable.

3) Psychological safety + high standards

Unarmored leadership is not “soft.” It combines care with rigor: people can speak up, and the work must still be excellent.

Example:

  • “I want dissent in this meeting—if you think this plan won’t work, say it. After we decide, we commit fully and measure outcomes.”

Reference: Amy Edmondson’s research on psychological safety shows that teams perform better when people feel safe to take interpersonal risks (e.g., admitting mistakes, asking questions), especially in complex work environments.

4) Curiosity over defensiveness

When challenged, armored leaders protect status; unarmored leaders protect truth. They ask questions before asserting.

Example: A teammate says, “This timeline is unrealistic.”

  • Armored response: “We’ve already committed—make it work.”
  • Unarmored response: “Walk me through what you’re seeing. What assumptions are breaking? What would a realistic plan look like?”

Impact: Better decisions and fewer hidden risks.

5) Clean, direct communication

Unarmored leaders reduce ambiguity. They don’t hint, triangulate, or hope problems resolve themselves.

Example: Instead of: “We should maybe tighten things up,” say:

  • “Starting next sprint, we’re enforcing code review on every PR. I’ll explain why, and we’ll revisit in four weeks with data.”

Impact: Less confusion, fewer politics, faster execution.

What unarmored leadership looks like in real scenarios

Scenario A: You made a high-visibility mistake

Unarmored approach:

  • State the facts plainly.
  • Own your part without self-flagellation.
  • Explain the fix and the learning.

Example message to the team:

“I want to address yesterday’s client call. I gave a delivery date that we hadn’t confirmed with engineering. That created pressure and confusion. I’m sorry—that was my mistake. Going forward, we’ll confirm dates through a single source of truth before committing externally. I’ll handle the client follow-up today and share the updated plan by 3 PM.”

Scenario B: A strong performer is behaving badly

Unarmored approach: Direct feedback, clear boundaries, and respect.

Example:

“Your output is excellent, and I value it. But the way you dismissed Jordan in the meeting shut down discussion. That can’t continue. I need you to challenge ideas without attacking people. If it happens again, we’ll move to a formal performance plan.”

Why this is unarmored: It avoids both conflict-avoidance (“distance armor”) and aggression (“control armor”). It’s calm, specific, and firm.

Scenario C: The team is afraid to speak up

Unarmored approach: Model vulnerability and reward candor.

  • Ask: “What are we not saying that we need to say?”
  • Publicly thank dissenters.
  • Change something based on input (even small) to prove it’s safe.

Example in a retrospective:

“I noticed we’re staying at the surface. I’ll go first: I pushed too many priorities and created thrash. What did I miss? What’s one thing we should stop doing immediately?”

Practices to build “unarmored” habits

1) The “Name it” pause

When you feel defensive, pause and silently label the emotion: “I’m feeling threatened / embarrassed / anxious.” This reduces impulsive reactions and helps you respond intentionally.

2) Replace “defend” with “discover”

Use a default script when challenged:

  • “Tell me more.”
  • “What data are you seeing?”
  • “What would change your mind?”

3) Make decisions legible

When announcing decisions, include:

  • Context: what’s happening
  • Criteria: what mattered most
  • Tradeoffs: what you’re sacrificing
  • Owner + timeline: who does what by when

4) Run “red team” moments

Assign someone to critique the plan. This normalizes dissent and reduces groupthink.

5) Normalize learning through after-action reviews

Use a consistent format:

  • What did we expect?
  • What happened?
  • What did we learn?
  • What will we change?

Reference: After-action reviews are widely associated with learning organizations and have been used in high-reliability settings (e.g., military, healthcare) to improve performance through structured reflection.

What unarmored leadership is not

  • Not oversharing: You can be honest without making the team your therapist.
  • Not indecision: You can invite input and still decide quickly.
  • Not “nice” at the expense of standards: Candor and accountability are central.
  • Not performative vulnerability: It’s not about appearing humble; it’s about being effective and trustworthy.

Why this is “the new way to lead”

Modern work is increasingly:

  • Complex: no single leader can know everything.
  • Interdependent: outcomes depend on cross-functional trust.
  • Fast-changing: learning speed beats static expertise.
  • Human-centered: retention and engagement hinge on meaning and respect.

Unarmored leadership aligns with these realities by increasing information flow (people speak up), strengthening commitment (people feel respected), and improving adaptability (teams learn quickly).

Selected references and related ideas

  • Amy C. Edmondson — Research on psychological safety, including “Psychological Safety and Learning Behavior in Work Teams” (1999) and later work such as The Fearless Organization (2018).
  • Brené Brown — Popular work on vulnerability, courage, and leadership, including Dare to Lead (2018). (Often cited in discussions of “armor” and defensive leadership behaviors.)
  • Kim ScottRadical Candor (2017): caring personally while challenging directly, closely aligned with unarmored communication.
  • Chris Argyris & Donald Schön — Organizational learning concepts (e.g., single-loop vs. double-loop learning), relevant to leaders who can question assumptions rather than defend them.
  • High Reliability Organization (HRO) principles — Emphasis on preoccupation with failure, deference to expertise, and learning systems—supported by leaders who don’t need to “be right” to lead well.

In practice, “unarmored” leadership is a daily discipline: choosing truth over image, curiosity over control, and accountability over blame—while still setting direction and holding standards. The result is not only healthier culture, but often better execution: fewer surprises, faster learning, and stronger trust when pressure hits.

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